Bonesy's Blahg

5 Real Life Characters I’ve Met Along The Way

1) Rose with the Long Toes.  Seriously, that’s what we called her.  Rose was my mom’s Avon lady back in the 70s/early 80s & she wore open-toed sandals all year long.  I’m pretty sure Rose couldn’t wear shoes.  No, for real!  Her toes were so long they looked like fingers & they hung over the edge of her sandals.  I don’t think she was really sports inclined, but I bet she could throw a baseball with those toes.  That’s how long they were!  To this day I still look at people’s feet in sandals, mentally measuring them up to Rose’s creepy finger toes.  I just can’t help myself.

2) Wee-ha.  This was another of my mom’s friends.  (I don’t know, maybe she was attracted to oddities.)  Her name was really Juanita, but she had a horrible speech impediment, so she couldn’t pronounce it.   I’m not making fun of people with speech defects (at least right now).   I didn’t make up the name.  She called herself Wee-ha!  I can’t tell you one thing about Wee-ha’s looks, but I will hear that voice, saying that name, till the day I die.

3) Man who carried his own hair at the Rock Hall.  Seriously. My husband & I went to the Rock & Roll HOF in Cleveland to watch the induction ceremony earlier this year.  As I’m checking out the Janis Joplin display, a guy comes up & stands beside me.  I looked over & it took me a second for my brain to wrap around this…but he was holding his own hair.  Under his arm.  Like a football.  He was about 60-ish, with one gigantic, dirty blonde/gray, flat dreadlock…that he had to carry around with him to keep it from dragging on the floor!  Dudes, I can’t make this stuff up.  I tried SO HARD to get a pic, but he moved a lot, so they were all blurry.   Also, he was kind of running… probably because I was kind of stalking him.  But that was a once in a lifetime opportunity!!  You tell me when I’m ever going to find another man who has to carry his own hair.

4) Homeless Cat Man.  I was taking my kids to school one morning & we passed the local homeless guy.  He was on the right side of the street, heading toward the park.  I dropped them off and was headed home, when I passed Homeless Guy on the other side of the street.  Carrying a dead rigor mortis cat by the tail.  Yeah.  Feet sticking straight out, full rigor mortis cat.  Dude had crossed the street to pick up a dead cat & I can only assume cook it up for breakfast.  No dumpster diving for Homeless Man that morning!  He probably got all excited at the chance to have “fresh” meat & not somebody’s half eaten trash can leftovers from the park.  It didn’t kill him, though.  Homeless Cat Man is still roaming the streets of my town.

5) Tex. I saved my favorite for last.  I met Tex at the Detroit HoeDown a couple of years ago (which has a story all it’s own, but I’ll save that for another post).  He was roaming the crowd, checking out the ladies, & dancing with anyone who would let him.  He didn’t care who was watching, or that it was about 80 degrees & he was wearing all black and LEATHER CHAPS!  We stopped him to ask for a picture & he happily posed with us for as many shots as we needed.  The next night, we ran into him again & this time struck up a conversation.  Tex pulled back his cowboy shirt & showed me the ports in his chest for his chemotherapy.  He then said this would be his last HoeDown & he was hoping to meet as many people as he could, to create as many memories as he could.  I scribbled his address on a scrap of newspaper I found & mailed copies of the pictures to him when I got home, with a note.  I won’t tell you what I wrote.  I will say that, every time I hear the song “Live Like You Were Dying” by Tim McGraw, I think of Tex.

Detroit HoeDown

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October 15, 2010 - Posted by | Friday 5

5 Comments »

  1. Dorene, your Tex encounter made me tear up. Wednesday, Carol & Bill Raub came to visit me b/c they were passing thru Canton. They are the parents of a very good friend from my airline days. I used to go visit them with Diane in Allentown. Wonderful people! Carol has incurable cancer and just had the last possible chemo that she can have. They have exhausted all the options. She is officially completing her Bucket List. It touched my heart that WE were on it! She had not seen me and the kids in several years and wanted to, one more time.
    Diane has never married or had children, so we were kind of a surrogate family.
    It was a bittersweet visit. I was thrilled to see and hug her but sad that this was probably the last time. It just sucks when bad things happen to such good people! Carol is a bit like Tex. She wants to see and do as much as possible while she still can. Attitude is everything when they get to this point in life.

    Comment by Dawn | October 15, 2010 | Reply

    • Wow, what a touching story, Dawn! To be ON somebody’s bucket list is an amazing honor.

      I lost a close cousin a couple of years ago to cancer. She was in a nursing home close to my work for the last couple months of her life. I would drop by on my lunch hour, bringing her ridiculously unhealthy food, & we would talk and laugh. I’ll cherish those last visits always.

      I think we should all start a list, just in case. You just never know how much time you have left, or how you’ll feel during it. In honor of Melody (my cousin) and your friend Carol, Next week’s Friday Five will be the first 5 things on my bucket list. Get to work, my friend. I hope to hear your top 5 in a comment next week!

      Comment by bonesysblahg | October 15, 2010 | Reply

  2. Dorene, that was an incredible post ! Tex was the best!!! Can’t wait to read your next post.

    Comment by Ruth Berman | October 15, 2010 | Reply

  3. Hey Dorene, Fantastic post, Tex really got to me 😦 Can’t wait to read the next post!!!!!

    Comment by Ruth Berman | October 15, 2010 | Reply

    • Thanks, Ruth! I’m working on updating more frequently. Sometimes it’s just hard to find the time to sit myself down & write. Plus, my muse is a fickle bitch.

      Comment by bonesysblahg | October 15, 2010 | Reply


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